Box of Monsters - Hall of Heads

Proof that a good CREATURE mask will make you more desirable to women can be had in the Abercrombie & Fitch Summer 2002 catalog! You need never again tolerate that most dreaded of questions, "Sure you've got a nice monster collection, but have you ever kissed a girl?"

As you can see in the first photo, slender young hotties will initially be repulsed and will try to resist your amorous advances. But by the next photo, it's clear that the Creech's pure prehistoric machismo, even when channeled through a rubber mask, is simply too irresistible. Soon, inhibitions are thrown to the wind like so much overpriced clothing, and each hottie gives in to her own amphibious instinct. Just like that. Wow!

So the next time you score that rare mask on eBay, don't forget... that might not be the only thing you're going to score! Incidentally, these pics are among a handful in the A&F catalog that do not feature nudity.

Naked girls. Monster masks. It's a man's world.

1975 the way I remember it: Life was pretty good for a ten-year-old monster fan, although things were becoming a little strange. The Universal favorites were losing popularity, having been trampled by everyone from Edgar Rice Burroughs to Dr. Zaius. Soon, they would be gobbled up by a great white shark, and then blasted into space-dust by George Lucas.

But for now, there were still plenty of Universal monsters action figures, Aurora models, and Don Post masks to be had. A Chiller Theater double-feature could still scare the crap out of a kid who had yet to be exposed to the gorier theatrical releases of the time. Famous monsters was still the Grand Poo-bah of magazines, and the pulpy, black and white images of creeps and fiends from decades ago seemed timeless!

For all the classic horror FM delivered to the die-hard monster fan though, it was the pages and pages of monster goodies I remember most clearly. Nervously slipping past a leering, Basil Gogos creation on the cover meant perusing the untold treasures of Captain Company awaiting within!

Now, I'm not really sure where I'm going with this, but I thought I'd post it anyway, simply because of all the familiar faces on these two pages from Famous Monsters #113. Check out the ad for the SHOCK MONSTER mask on this page, and the original issue Calendar masks on this page, which also features a "sold out" Verne Langdon ZOMBIE mask. Great stuff, huh? But has SHOCK MONSTER and the ZOMBIE ever enjoyed a revival like the Calendar masks? Read on!

Nope, you ain't seein' things! That is indeed the creepy, pebble-skinned ZOMBIE mask that once graced the back pages of Famous Monsters and the cover of Creepy. Well sort of. It's actually a recreation of said mask by The Mask Doctor himself, Kelly Mann. Kelly tells us this new version is absolutely faithful to the Verne Langdon original, including that crazy cretinous coiffure! Far out, man! Verne Langdon's ZOMBIE is a collectors piece, not a production mask, so it'll cost just a little more (but not that much) and is available from Retro Rubber.

If you watch the Halloween mask industry closely, you may know that Dynamic Design International was offering a $200 custom collector's mask of the familiar puss to the left. "$200? Hmm, too pricey for me!" you might say. Well, Mr. Cheapo, guess what! You can get it for a fraction of that! Yep yep, the mask pictured, officially titled SCHLOCK MONSTER, has become a production mask that retails for a typical retail price. Can you stand it? Then high-five yer neighbor!

Finally, after many, many moons (heh, get it?) the HMA's tribute to everyone's favorite unlucky (?) tourist is up for grabs as a limited edition (25 pieces), non-wearable display bust. Non-wearable?! I'm just gonna' freakin' kill myself! Anyway, it's called TRANSFORMATIONS, and I know my good friend over at HMA, Eric Austin, pushed for quite a while to get this thing produced. Fellas, it was absolutely worth the wait! I didn't mean to call you a meatloaf, Eric.

That disgusting, Italian ZOMBIE that leapt from the movie screen into the pages Famous Monsters and declared, "We're going to eat you!" is now available as a wearable, and affordable, collectors mask from those creeps over at Bump in the Night Productions. Wow! Do I know how to write a great run-on sentence or what? Anyway, Chuck Jarman (who, incidentally, sculpted the "saucerman" mask shown elsewhere on this site) told us that there's much more to come! Can't wait to see what's next!

MORE HEADS >